Reclaiming self-esteem

The importance of Self-Esteem

“Each of us is endowed with the innate resources that enable us to achieve all we have ever dreamed of. However, if your self-esteem is low, you will never feel you deserve it.”

Can I really reclaim it?

YES, for sure! It’s a bit like Peter Pan’s shadow; you did have it, but you lost it along the way. What we need to do is go on the hunt for it together! When we eventually find it again, we will sew it on tight to make sure we never lose it again.

There is no quick fix, no definitive answer, but when you seek it out you will find it. When we let go of guilt, fear, shame, and tame the inner bully, the critical voice that tells you that you are not good enough, you will start to feel the shift slowly starting to happen. It’s a bit like working a muscle. Initially, it may feel sore but over time the pain subsides as the muscle becomes stronger. When you really get to know yourself and start to appreciate the wonder of ‘you’, every relationship you have will change for the better.

Did I ever have Self-Esteem?

Yes, you were born with it but as soon as you reach an age that you can understand and listen, you may hear opinions and statements from others around you, such as parents, grandparents, siblings, and teachers, which start to have an influence on how you view yourself. As a youngster you will believe everything you are told “you are useless,” “you will never amount to anything,” “if only you could be as bright as your sibling.” Sometimes people can become jealous of you and try to attack your self-esteem… because it’s easy to rock and very difficult to rebuild! Self-esteem is the soft underbelly of the human condition, and it’s very easily attacked.

Low self-esteem can also result in you becoming a ‘people pleaser’ which means you never get your needs met. When you find yourself in this situation others may try to take advantage of your ‘good nature’.